This is a space for anyone who wants to read someone's story to help themself through a difficult time but it is also a safe space for you to share your own story so you can help others going through that same problems. The stories are anonymous but you can request to put your name to it.
‘Right before my suicide attempt, I looked like I had it all. A job in my field, a good relationship, and the first undergraduate published in The New York Times. I also thought about killing myself constantly. Why didn’t I reach out to anyone? Well, the truth is that I had. I quietly tried to share that I was struggling, but instead of help, I was told that I was selfish, being dramatic, and needed to pray. None of these messages was helpful. I felt like a burden and learned to hide my pain and pretend. After a sexual assault, the years of stuffing down my feelings eventually erupted into a suicide attempt. Healing looks different for everyone, but for me it was connecting with the feelings I had avoided, developing boundaries, trauma-informed therapy, mental health advocacy, and removing toxic people from my life. I’ve built a safety net of family and friends to catch me when I fall. When someone is physically sick, we know exactly what to do. We bring casseroles, send flowers and cards, and think about what someone who is in pain needs. I don’t think it should be any different for folks who are feeling suicidal. Personally, I need connection and to interrupt the isolation and negative thoughts in my head. So, please be good to each other. Check on your strong friends who have it together, and your friends who are “too busy” and disappeared. If we can create a world where the stigma of suicide is decreased so people speak out when they are in pain, maybe we can prevent anyone else from dying.’
- Anonymous
Communication is one of the key aspects that needs to improve to raise awareness about suicide
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When I was studying abroad, I heard that a few of my close family friends had passed away. As I kept getting the news, I found myself starting to feel really empty and genuinely numb to the outside world. I was crying nearly every day and just felt a hopelessness that wouldn't go away. It was a strange feeling that I had never experienced before. During class, the only thing I could think about was getting back in my bed. About a month after dealing with this, I was diagnosed with "seasonal depression," and it was really hard because all my friends wanted to go out and would practically make fun of me when I didn't want to.
I felt embarrassed to tell them I was going through it, and, even worse, having to take medication for it. I would get stuck in conversations where people said that depression was just an excuse people make and wasn't even a real thing. It's funny, because I always questioned people suffering from the same thing. It was really hard, and makes you feel even more isolated. It's strange because you begin to distance yourself from everyone and relationships get really difficult and unbalanced. Luckily, I wanted to force myself off the medicine and try more of a homeopathic routine, and it worked. I sometimes have off days, but it was the true friendships and family support that helped me overcome it. After going through it myself, it made me look at mental illness in a whole new way that really needs to be addressed.
—Anonymous
I believe my first thoughts of suicide where probably my own. My thoughts were not crystal clear but rather a reoccurring idea that it would be better for me not to exist. These ideas would come and linger for a while, and then they would go away. I remember lying in one of my sister’s twin beds, were chatting away before going to sleep. We were deeply close friends and talked about everything. I asked her if she ever had these types of thoughts. I fully expected her to say “sometimes”, “don’t worry, that is normal” but she deadpan said “no, never”. I don’t not remember if we continued our conversation, but I do remember thinking for a long while how come she does not have these same thoughts.
-Anonymous
My lovely, beautify and intelligent friend from whom I was inseparable began to display some episodes of psychotic and suicidal behavior. I ignored or overlooked some of these signs and attributed to my good friend’s bumpy ride transitioning from home life to college. And, the fact she fell in love with a boy who was addicted to drugs. But, she was my best friend, I loved her...... together we loved learning, talking about poetry and books. I gave her a copy of Sylvia Plath's’ book The Belljar. A combination of the book, other readings, college angst, and some family genetics lead to some new displays of anxiety disorders.
I tried with all my energy for years to care for her. My mother had always relied on me to help her. So when my dearest friend started to struggle I thought I could resolve her issues. While she struggled through these challenges and overcame both we grew closer and our friendship stayed strong.
-Anonymous